Processing pain through journaling
For ongoing health we must listen to our heart. The Bible tells us that our heart is a governing seat in our life and a holding place of all that is important to us; out of it flow all the issues of life. Prov 4:23 tells us, “Guard your heart (and its thoughts) above all else, for it determines the course of your life.” NLT
The Bible, in many ways, is a journal of God’s interaction with mankind. In it David says that God keeps a written record of our life – “You keep track of all my sorrows. You have collected all my tears in your bottle. You have recorded each one in your book” Psa 56:8. Many of the Psalms are a form of journaling – inner processing written down.
God said to Jeremiah, “Write in a book all the words I have spoken to you” Jer 30:2. He said this so they would have a written record of the interactions between God, Jeremiah, and the people of Israel.
What is journaling
Journaling is a processing tool – one you can use to engage with, and express, the thoughts of your heart, and your mind, and examine your feelings. Journaling can be used to express gratitude, tap into your goals and dreams, or simply to keep a record of the day. Or you can go deeper and use it as a deeply personal activity that can help you recognise and process what is happening in your life. Journaling for processing gives us insight into our heart state, our deepest thoughts, our hurts and fears, and allows us to gain insight from the Lord for healing, and for how we can move forward in life from a place of peace. It can involve both writing and art – drawing, collage, etc.
Journaling brings the best results, and is most helpful, when the Holy Spirit is included in the process.
The Holy Spirit knows us at a deep intimate level, so He can give us insight into the true state of our heart.
He is our truest comforter, our counsellor, our life guide and healer.(John 14:16; 16:13; Isa 61:1-7).
Journaling creates a record of the insights and wisdom that the Holy Spirit gives us.
Some general journaling tips
Banish your internal critic and editor. This is the voice that says, “That’s just silly”, “Don’t go there”, “It’s best left buried”, “Don’t dig up the pain”, “You shouldn’t be writing that”, etc…Here are a few tricks to banish this voice…
Write quickly and keep writing, allowing the words to freefall from your subconscious. Don’t stop to erase or cross out any words, it’ll stop the flow.
Don’t worry about how well you write. The important thing is to write down what makes sense and comes naturally to you.
Remember that no one else needs to read what you’ve written. This will help you write authentically and avoid ‘putting on a show.’
If you’re heading in a direction you would rather avoid, finish the sentence and put an asterisk ( * ) beside it. If you aren’t ready to look at that right then, the asterisk will be a visual reminder of something you need to go back to, look at, and address. Then start a new paragraph, writing about what you want to write about. Do make sure that you go back to the asterisk later, though; don’t ignore it or dismiss it.
Set a goal to write for a certain amount of time. Aim for 5-15 minutes a day to start with. It’s okay to write only a few words, and it’s okay to write several pages. Write at your own pace.
Date each entry in your journal. Note the time, place, and any details regarding your mood and emotions that will be necessary for context when you look back on your work.
Take a break before re-reading. After you have finished a journal entry, get up for a glass of water, or take a short walk before you re-read your entry, and remember to re-read this entry with compassion. If the subject is a delicate one, there is nothing wrong with putting off re-reading it for a short period.
Exit smart. At the end of your time journaling re-read what you’ve written and reflect on it, and write a sentence or two about what you think the Holy Spirit is trying to communicate to you in this journal entry. Sometimes this insight is as plain as day; other times it will take a little reading between the lines, and prayer, to discover.
Journaling for processing life’s pains …
Using journaling to process life events and pain can be one of the ways the Holy Spirit ministers grace, power, healing, and understanding to us.
Set aside time and create a safe space. When processing heart pain through journaling, privacy is necessary – a place and time where you won’t be interrupted. Deep pain, when permitted to be expressed, often results in tears, which can sometimes be an intense experience.
Develop an atmosphere of the presence of God in worship. Pray in the Spirit (in tongues) – this helps build up your spirit being. You may want to use music without lyrics to keep an ongoing atmosphere of peace.
If processing pain concerning someone close to you…you can feel a conflict between loyalty and speaking the truth. Sometimes people think they are dishonouring a person if they reveal what happened, but you can’t heal what you won’t face and truthfully acknowledge.
The following is an extremely effective way to process pain through with the Lord.
Start with two side-by-side pages – a Gratitude page and a Grieving page.
Gratitude page – Write down the good things the person has done, and any good things about the situation. When you’ve finished, then read through the good things you wrote. In your heart and mind acknowledge, and thank, the person for what they’ve given to you.
Grieving page – Write out what the person did that hurt you, or what they withheld from you, as that can have as much impact as something done to you can.
Investigate your thoughts and feelings. Write out honestly what you are feeling in your heart – your confusion, anger, hurt, where you feel the stress or pain in your body etc.
Write down any ongoing effects it’s had on your life.
Write down how you have reacted to prevent being hurt again – what coping mechanisms do you use – trying to be more spiritual, overt positivity, denial, dissociating, drinking, shopping etc.
Don’t try to hurry. It’s important to give time as sometimes things take a while to emerge in our heart and memory.
If there are emotions, let them flow. Tears are the language of the heart.
Your response to what they did – Bring the pain and hurt to the Cross and ask God to heal it. Write down your prayer for healing, then record God’s response. He will often want to give you insight, comfort and guidance, as a Father to a son or daughter. Renounce any vows you made as a result of the person’s treatment, and any wrong attitudes you had, behavioural responses, etc. Tell God you choose to release the person/people from your judgement (forgive), and sever in the spirit any soul ties that bind you to them.
Forgive yourself for any wrong responses you had, and any wrong behaviour that resulted etc.
I hope you find this way of processing situations helpful; it has been a big help in my life as I’ve worked through pain and hurts.